Marijuana and Jesus

Alright this isnt going to be hyper-poetic or some groundbreaking treatise on legalizing weed or Jesus. The idea to even compose sentences about it comes from this article I read last night on the NYtimes. Im busy schoolin and Cookie'in but thought I would throw down a quick rant cheaply conceived like a white trash baby in the backseat of a 1984 Lebarron.

Check the link v------v
http://roomfordebate.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/07/19/if-marijuana-is-legal-will-addiction-rise/
If Marijuana Is Legal, Will Addiction Rise?

Addiction to weed, what? Jesus? Twitter? (sorry that last one kinda just comes out) I feel like those naturally inclined to be "addicted" to weed have already found their yellow brick road to their Emerald Pothead City in the land of OZ. We all know this type, from about junior high on they emerge. They make the scarecrow seem like Steven Hawking at times but are we worried that the rest of the world is going to follow this path. No, this zainy cast of pot-characters may already have their heads floating almost as high and as green as the wizard himself but that doesn't mean we are going to see a stampede of high buffalos if we legalize pot. In any case, for fucksake is weed some Deadly Molten Liquid Hot Magma to society the way Herion or Meth are? Pass me a fucking break(always to the left). Stoners only hurt one thing, pot plants. They cut off their sex organs burning them or grinding them into all kinds of food. C'mon, Bad? Addiction? I dont even think the argument needs to be made. So lets get to the point. I am more interested in why it was ever made illegal in the first place. Tobaccy without being whacky is physically addictive and totally lethal but completely Legal. The Duke smoked up a Marlboro on screen and never paid a fine for a sprinkle of tobacco shake in his glove box. So thinking about the rejection of pot I am pondering as a principle, who the hell came up with the idea to tell you what you can do, put in or fuck with your own god given body as long as it doesnt hurt or limit someone else's freedom. Hmmmm and that's where J-man comes in... with his religion... and gay-ass culture .. oh and just the whole idea of Christian Slave morality...a morality that we all are still slaves of.

So wait what does this have to marijuana and why are we talking about it you may ask? I told you because I read that article and since I pretty much hate Christianity all the time I melted the 2 topics together into a fine dip for thought like velvetta and chili. (which of the 2 examples would be Jesus is up for debate)

J-man came down landed himself on the cross becoming doughnut hands for pissin off the Romans with his magic powers right?. On the cross he went and whipped out his holy cock and bitch slapped slave Christian morals and the like onto his own followers. Why not just the Romans who put you up there oh Doughnut Hands? Why? Of course the story goes after much mass murdering, torture and warring yada yada yada the Christians came to predominant power and here we are. So let me explain this Christian Slave moral bologna(dont worry Ill get back to pot soon enough). The idea is that we are all horrible animals. Eve, that gluttonous whore made from a rib fucked up the whole perfection thing by eating the fruit and Adam for some reason followed this slut into the world. Now our whole purpose in life is to avoid all passion, pleasure, drive, will and the like to ascribe to handcuffed, cookie cuttered and most important constrained life laid out for us in the great book. The only pleasure lies in the great beyond of paradise that awaits on the flipside...the meaning of life is to hold tight and not live a single second outside the authoritarian control of Christianity. Just clench your butthole around their retarded beliefs and make way too many babies. We are now all the victims of the holy retarded idea of mandated abstinence and punishment for any deviantion along with our poor Xbox loving, plant molesting stoners in arms. We have shaken a lot of this bullshit off but in America but we are still stuck with laws passed by a chain gang of holy abstinence Christian pussies, reflecting the Puritan strain of the Christian virus. Oh yes the Puritans are little bitch slapped cowardly witch burners with the messiah's doughnut hand so far up their ass they stah stah stuttered their way from England to the Americas.

So even in the light of blaring common sense, hard and true real world facts, our laws still reflect the idiocy of this line of thinking. Backed by an irrationally charged electorate with dominion to create and maintain failures like prohibition and the war on drugs following their holy models based on ideas eons old. Naturally they will not understand the concept of freedom, liberty, experience and common sense. Hello, remember that whore eve and how we are to be their plastic dickless pious Ken Doll. They will seek prohibition in every area that has not been ordained as "free" to their choosing by the Bible(great for rolling joints). Weed is not in the bible (wait are guns, teabags or Mormon pajamas?) so it should not be allowed and a point for punishment.

Seeing the authorities violently oppress, control and punish Pot gives society a semi, as it cannot get a full erection out of the natural passions of life...that, like pot is a sin...stroking their moral cocks they see this as the only acceptable way to deal with this devil's bush(not the burning one). Of course it's short sided, petty and ignorant but c'mon war and prohibition are awesome and they always work out even on drugs. The fight no matter how stupid like the war on evil must rage on FOREVER. No matter what the cost. No matter how over crowded our jails get or brown people are killed on the border. We are fighting the good fight. In my view with Christians, Americans, our society is full of a lot of weak pussies... who sadly can and do VOTE. So we're forced to obey the laws of pussies. Even as the war on drugs as we are fighting it does nothing but jack up the price of drugs, organize a criminal syndicate and push drug users, dealers, smugglers and ring leaders to the most dire criminal acts imaginable. We are all the victims but the Christians love sacrifice (they’re banking on it). All of this remember to stop with force an untaxable commodity that only causes massive costs to prohibit and to holy WAR against.

Think however, just like with other wars politicians are not employed by common sense or by making tough decisions but rather are employed by an electorate who like to be force fed what they want to hear as well as most important industries and defense departments that would love to make a shit ton on contracts, mobilization etc. Best of all this whole mess is on the taxpayer’s dime. OK, so this is all getting way to "real" for Jesus but I am just shedding light on the concept of where ridiculous laws and prohibitions like this come from and how they are maintained despite being absurd... its from the bitch slapped slave moralities of pussy ass Christians. This type of irrational thinking makes them weak sheep that only get a rise in life out of watching and enjoying the punishment of others. Like watching Mel Gibson have his organ spaghetti sprayed everywhere for not accepting the divine right of his king. Christ! what a treat.

Having personally been affected so deeply that I think about drug policy every single day of my life dont think that I am looking to try and argue for some self indulgent desire to have cheap easy access to all drugs at all times... Just understanding that soceity is more willing to pay for a helicopter to shoot at poor farmers in Columbia but not on methadone and or treatment because sinners dont deserve it. It really grinds my gears... if you understand even the most simple explanation of supply and demand economics then look at our war on pot over the past 30 years then prepare yourself for your head to be smacked by your own hand with other working to catch your dropping jaw... or prepare for your faith in the holy battle of abstinence and prohibition to be reaffirmed as a waging war that will only end when you enter paradise while others burn beneath your wings. Why can't we just have the kids burn plants in the basement beneath your main floor instead?

Obesity! Human Pot Pies

You see these people at the grocery. *whispers* the obeseesssse */whispers quote unquote "people" right. You see them in motion which is an amazing spectacle all its own. Such a massive project in movement is always quite the sight. They cannot walk, they are upright and moving but not walking, they are lumbering if anything. Their stretch cloth moomoo-esk clothing, sweat pants, or a dresses tailored for a manatee or a partially shaven grizzly bear with downsyndrome stretch on their bodies wishing to soon be set free by radiation away from this fat fucking nucleus. Who knows under the friction that builds between flab continents enough heat for nuclear fission may be possible. They lumber on feet smashed square like elephant hooves, they are blasted with weight, they are carrying the weight of a world literally on their flattened arches. The weight of the planet that is this person for which they are forced to transport through the space vaccum that is the frozen food isle of Smiths Marketplace. They are an embodiment of the limits of physics.

These human impersonators more sack of mayo than man are just 1 step away from graduating to a jazzy scooter designed by nasa to transport 2+ tons of melted twinkies, buffalo wings, french toast and pizza. They are another step away from washing themselves with baby wipes taped to a stick. Their ascent is complete to this enormous life form that is 3/4s lipid lasagna that audaciously I am expected to consider human.. you may ask how can you hate these people? are they not just sad victims ... Were they not raised on dominos delivery, and trained like dogs with happy meals for not shitting on the rug...or outside on the side of the kilby house by the ladder(wtf you fucking asshole why?) How can they be hated? Well, how can a heroin addict be hated? how can a chronic masturbator be hated? How can one who ritualistically farts in elevators be hated? Here is a better question for you. What runs through these peoples bloated heads when they are sitting on the john flowing over the edge of the seat dropping an epic family of cosbys off at the pool. Ill tell you what they are thinking "GOD! I should of brought that submarine hoagie in here with me, Fuck look at me Im wasting away here dropping off my last reason for living at the porcelain express.

I mean come on Millions die from lack of cabbage or yams to eat, yet these obese wastes of space commit suicide with plastic wrapped pastries. These people are completely oblivious to the science that is their body, the science that is nourishment. They seem to be only conscious of their mutated gluttonous appetite. They have a holy faith to food that turns its back on the truth of calories and physical activity. They have given up completely on 1/2 of natures gift of purpose for life. Sexuality is robbed of its purpose. Isnt part of the essence of the sexual gaze of others based on assessing the vitality, the effort, the accomplishments as well as the natural form all of which is of course robbed and "eatin" away to nothing. In this state of obesity-stasis they are a physical embodiment of gluttony, selfishness, disregard, indifference, and morbid weakness. They are a bitch slapped slave to value meals and salivating insatiable taste buds. We are all fucked in one way or another by the human condition. Expectations of build, personality, intelligence etc that are completely unattainable but fuck man life is not enduring it is over coming if it is anything at all. Its ok to judge and end up hating weakness and epic failures.

HARSH! a more sensitive soul may ask Why cant you just pity them?, Obviously I do pity them.. thats where it starts but thats problem in pitying them I enter their stay puff marshmellow being. I empathize with them and after investigation of the possible scenarios that is their body and mind fucked by Dairy Queen I find no excuses plausible for their unbelievable contemptible cream filled creation. My sexual senses, my nostrils, my eyes, my idea of human dignity, my optimism for humanity and understanding of inequality are afflicted and accosted by this planet Wingers calling himself Michael. My affirmation of life is challenged, hell is other people and the daemons of the darkest devil is an obese 2 ton ameba who I am forced to acknowledge and endure. Whose gaze I am to consider in my attempt in being for others. Yes, Sartre hated fat people too... he hated everyone. Im with Sartre at least on judgement of the human pot pies and self indifferent failures..I apologize for being overly candid and brutally over liposuctioning with extreme prejudice. A request of all my future or current type 2 diabetes patient friends Lose some weight or at the very least until a cloaking device can be invented wear a moomoo with a screen print on it of a real human being who wont make me loathe humanity at first sight.

My Un-Eulogy for Michael Jackson

Really? "Michael we'll miss you" ?... Our dear departed Michael I've missed you since 1992. You see you miss someone when they are gone not just rotting… he was launched into outer fucking space to planet-crazy on a pop-culture rocket decades ago and it is at that point that I truly mourned for him. Why are all the lost souls and their void fillers in the media worshiping this guy like a new black to white Jesus, who tortured his own face like Roman guards? I have missed his talent and his sanity for longer than most of Jackos delicious jail baits have been alive. You see, I will not miss his Oxy guzzling, preteen ass-spelunking, post-modern zombie skin bleaching, blanket dangling, face fucked by NASA crazy once black ass. To esteem him in every moment up until death and beyond is a Holy-abomination to the whole concept of respect and mourning. Get a life, grow up and moon walk your way out of never-never land into reality and try to start walking with the Earth again as it spins underneath the slick bottoms of your penny loafers. I will miss the large bear cub family I left in the toilet this morning after my ceremonial cup-of-joe more than Jack. I will miss the trillions of dollars we’ve all spent on stimulating banker’s unwashed taints. I will miss Neda Agha-Soltan who was shot through the heart in Tehran even before she had a chance to write a hit album or rape a child with the help of spiked cool-aid named after ole doughnut-hands. I had a lot more in common with her. I will miss Robert Mcnamara who decided to throw his gemmed glove into the Cuban-missile crisis instead of a kiddie pools filled with Pilipino boys cream’d corns. I will miss never being able to hear new ways to laugh at the world from Vonnegut, Updike, and Foster-Wallace. I will miss the scrilla I just threw down on my $160 bi-monthly health premium. I will miss the $30 in wallet marrow I just burned up in my gas tank. I will miss all the non-pop-idol troops lost fighting for my ability to relentlessly trash celebrities and public officials without hesitation…*coughs* online.. I will miss Judas, Hussein and Dahmer more than post-rape wacko-jacko. We had more to learn from their software version of insane. I mean an infinitely talented man steamrolled and gang-clustfucked by fame and a blood thirsty society is nothing new or special. I will miss the man Michael could have been if left alone with maybe some serious help. I mourn for the society-beheaded sad once king of pop. I mourn for the lost opportunity that was his life and I send my condolences to those in his family who knew who he truly was deep down before he was beaten by Dad and society to a pulp of pop culture grease. I respect and praise holy the man who at one time first gave little 7 year old me the idea that perhaps someone else could indeed be way cooler than Jesus and Joseph Smith. Almost walking on water this guy, a man, a mere mortal with way sweeter hymns a true King among men/women. I’ve missed this cooler than Mormon Jesus guy ever since but allowed myself to cut that praise off when it started to become rancid and toxic.

To be fair if now is a time to remember him I raise my 2^nd cup of joe to Michael Joseph Jackson the little boy from Indiana with a fiery talent few can ever spark in themselves. It is with deference that I acknowledge that after many unfortunate circumstances of a life a man spread over time became a figure liken to Dr. Wacko-Jacko and Mr Hyde(the king of pop). All the while I throw my cup in the air to you but still keeping my eyes solidly level on the shit, issues and people that truly matter and demand my attention and forward thinking respect. Thanks Michael, and no thanks Jacko.